We may not proceed into talking about planning wedding without first understanding the time limit for which two people can be in courtship. Now, I will like you to know that there is no specific time limit or duration for two lovers to stay in courtship. However, as a leader, I will advice my youth to spend a minimum of one to three years in courtship before consummating their relationship into marriage. This is not a command but just an advice.
Someone said “if you rehearse madness for too many years for how will you live to practice it”. There are lots of folks whose courtship supposed to have been consummated into matrimony long before now but could not achieve such success because they do not know how to go about it. There are those, who, due to a desire to have an unnecessarily big and flamboyant wedding event, the type that will require a great deal of finance to make it a success, they haven’t been able to bring their expired courtship to the expected conclusion.
There are lot of wedding planning counselors out there nowadays who could help you plan your wedding according to your financial capacity. Nevertheless, in this chapter, I’ll offer you the simplest ideal way to planning your wedding ceremony.
First, you must understand that the matrimonial success does not depend on the flamboyancy of the wedding ceremony. In other words, an exotic wedding may not result in blissful matrimony. As a matter of fact, wedding only lasts for a day but the marriage for more than a day and by the will of God, marriage should last till death parts the couple. Therefore, you don’t have to go into unnecessary borrowing or spending in other to consummate your courtship into marriage; for no matter how much money you may spend, the wedding only lasts for just that one day; whereas, your marriage will last till death. It will be proper to save much than to spend much.
Sensibly plan your wedding! Do not build your castle in the air; for why should you enter into debt, spending your first season in matrimony for debts settlement— means the debts you have incurred in a bid to have a great and the ‘who is who’ kind of wedding. Listen even if you do not need to borrow the money—your account is very fat and could run the wedding ceremony without borrowing, you could still make a wise plan to invest the money in preparation for your soon to be family i.e. yourself, your spouse and the yet unborn children.
Types Of Wedding
There are three major types of wedding globally. Each one of these three is potentially alright for the consummation of courtship into marriage. There is the type called the Formal Wedding, the Semi-Formal Wedding and the Informal Wedding.
The Formal Wedding
This type of wedding is the one certified by the government of the area where the couple are joined together in matrimony. This type of wedding is very impor- tant especially for legality sake. It gives the legal power to either of the two over each other as it has to do with the law of the society and the institution of marriage thereby serving as a check against arbitrary behavior in the matrimony.
The Semi-Formal Wedding
This type of wedding is largely conducted by religious organizations. It is called semiformal because it holds little or no water in the court of law. However, it is equally very efficacious and as a matter of fact, some churches have been given the legal power to conduct wedding and such weddings are very legal and its certificate could be tendered anywhere as a legal entity.
The Informal Wedding
Just as the name implies, these types of wedding does not hold any water in the court of law. It is a form of wedding that is done by the bride and the groom’s fam- ily. It could be flamboyantly done in a big party form or a mini parlor party. It is called a traditional wedding. This type is common in Africa. It features the parent of both couple and all well-wishers coming together to bless the couple with gifts and prayers. Each of these enumerated types of wedding is potentially and ideally enough for the consummation of any courtship into matrimony; you don’t neces- sarily have to do all of these wedding.
Now, there are folks who do not know that each one of these three is equal to the other; as such they estimated it to mean that they have not wedded if they have only gathered the families of the two people in courtship together for an engagement ceremony, where the parents and all well-wishers pour out prayers and give gifts to the couple. They opinionated it to be a complete wedding, if only they are able to go to the priest to have the church aspect of the wedding and to the court for registration of the wedding; due to this, they concluded that it will take a great deal of finances to consummate their relationship into marriage.
This is not true! You can plan your wedding a little and plan your matrimonial life a big way—full of fun and success. You don’t have to spend all you have saved on your wedding day; remember the wedding day lasts for just hours while your marriage will last for many days, months and years and by the will of God, it should last till the death of one or both of you.
How To Plan The Wedding
I am of the opinion that it will do much good for us to look at a moderate way to plan for each of the types of wedding explained in this chapter one by one.
How to plan for a formal wedding
Just like I did mention the other time that this type of wedding is well certified by the government of the area where the wed- ding is conducted and it is legally backed up; yet it is very affordable. The courts of registry have their official charges which once you pay and come along with all their requirements such as wedding rings, bible and some snacks with few people (as few as four people), you could be wedded. This kind of wedding is the most af- fordable of all and you may not have to go into unnecessary cooking and spending.
How to plan for a semiformal Wedding
planning for semiformal wedding varies; as the requirements of the denomination or the local assembly where the couple fellowship may the different from where another couple fellowships also. However, I’ll say that no matter what, you can plan your wedding a little and plan your matrimony a great way. All that matter in this type of wedding is the priest blessing and the witness of the saints and to obtain this you don’t have to squander all your earnings. Listen do not try to impress anybody! Impress yourself by making a very wise plan. If you kill 100 cows the people will help you to consume them and nothing will be left—people are there to help you spend your savings but no one will be there to join you in your dry seasons. May you not experience any era of dryness in your matrimony in Jesus name. Amen!
How to plan for an informal wedding
this type of wedding is probably the most complicated one of the three. It varies from people to people, culture to culture, tribe to tribe e.t.c. However, all that matters in this type of wedding is the cultural/ traditional rites and requirements of the parents of the couple. In some places, the groom pays the bride price while in some places the bride pays the dowry. Whichever way, all that matter is that you plan your wedding very wisely and try as much as possible to cut down your expenditures, bearing in mind that wedding only lasts for a day but marriage goes beyond one day and there are several other things you need to use the money to achieve. Spend less and save more.